Ten tips for every concert hall

The Paris Philharmonie does them all

It’s been a good week for Old Art. A reaffirmed international fervour for ballet and opera has tossed the naysayings of Timothee Chalamet into a cocked hat, as it were, and has opened a gush of affection for the classical canon alongside waggish events such as Seattle Opera offering discounted tickets if you use the promo code TIMOTHEE.

Hence if you are one of those folk interested in Old Art, namely ballet, opera and classical music, this newsletter is devoted to my experience this week at the Paris Philharmonie, whose main concert hall my husband and I visited and which, in my view, copes with key elements of concert-going which some British arts centres could take on board. And I know, it cost a fortune and took 20 years to build.

1. Clever marketing

We were only at the Paris Philharmonie because I had been tempted by a ‘bargain basket’ of events, namely the Paris Opera Subscription. 4 operas, one ballet and one concert. I really wanted to see the operas, was happy to see Giselle and, well, if you want to throw in a concert by the Paris Opera Orchestra of Mozart and Bruckner, then I don’t mind if I do. Call it the anti-Chalamet bundle. It forces one to go to something you probably wouldn’t have thought about booking.

2. A spectacular building, maintained as such.

The Paris Philharmonie, designed by Jean Nouvel in the working-class 19th arrondissement of Paris after a delay of 20 years and at a cost of, ahem, around £350 million, opened finally in 2015. It is something to behold. Waves of concrete and billows of shiny metal, covered with bird-shaped tiles onto which have been projected, or imprinted, a filigree of trees. When you approach at night, the building looks as if it is covered with ivy, or living birds, or trees. It is sensational. No litter, no advertising, no hoardings, no commercial outlets ruin the spectacular effect as you advance on it from the Metro. Just for comparison, the Philharmonie recieves an annual government subsidy of around 40 million Euros, and raises around 45 million Euros from tickets, sponsorship and space rentals.

My photograph of the spectacular exterior of the Paris Philharmonie. What a glorious thing!

3. A focused interior

The quiet uncommercial calm continues within. There are no shops, concessions or even What’s On posters inside. There are no illuminated screens showing other attractions. There is no worn lino or tired parquet. The floors are carpeted with thick black carpet. There are loads of loos, all of which are lit beautifully and maintained perfectly. Programmes are free. The whole essence is about getting you in the mood for what you are about to see and hear.

Honestly, this was the vibe of the area just outside the Hall, just before the show. Focused.

4. Easy food

We’ve all had the quandary. The show begins mid-evening. Do you burn your mouth by rushing a meal before, or get by with a packet of crisps and a tub of icecream, or risk stomach ulcers by eating at 10.30pm? Paris Philharmonie answers all these questions by providing large semi circular sandwiches sitting not in some hideous fridge, but quietly, in a basket, at the bar. Ham, Salmon or Egg Mayonnaise. Wrapped in brown paper, not sweaty plastic. It was just what was needed.

THIS is what you want before a concert. Not a 3 course meal afterwards

5. Sympathetic human-orientated programming

Rather than start with the 9 minute Coriolan Overture, which artistic directors clearly think nobody has ever heard before (clue: we have), then make you grind through the hard stuff, and only reward you with Mozart AFTER the interval, as if you were a naughty child, this concert from the Orchestre Opera de Paris, conducted by Marek Janowski, began at 8pm, which is sensible, didn’t bother with Beethoven’s amuse-bouche, but went straight into Mozart’s 39^th Symphony and only after the interval, were the brass and timpani let loose on Bruckner’s Symphony No 4, the “Romantique”.

6. Spectacular auditorium

Asymmetrical, flowing, beautiful, with cantilevered balconies meaning that each one of the 2,400 people is no more than 45 metres from the conductor (apparently). No frayed carpet (Royal Albert Hall), scuffed floors (Festival Hall), distant loos (Barbican), or tricky access (anywhere in South London).

Breathtaking…with husband leading the way

7. No eating or drinking in the auditorium

Need I say more? If the person rattling a cup full of ice behind me for the entire second half of Arcadia at the Old Vic last Wednesday is reading this Substack, please read, mark, learn, and INWARDLY DIGEST.

My Room 101. People eating whole meals in the theatre

8. Young audience

Whether because of the venue, which is staunchly within a working class, residential neighbourhood, the two-hour running time, the familiar composers, or the funky building, the audience was absolutely not of the typical British style, in other words this was a group of people whose birthdays were probably on balance nearer to the First Gulf War than 1945.

9. General Parisian bonhomie and happiness

The whole thing was beautiful, and stress-free, and relaxed. Hard for concert halls in Britain to get quite this je ne sais quoi, but they could try.

10. Happy customers usually want a return visit

We booked to see Paris Opera’s entire Ring Cycle this November. Tout a fait!